Wednesday, July 20, 2011

What is wrong with me, I definetly can't let go! I love him so much and he acts like I never existed.Help....?

My boyfriend completely changed after he took his new job out of town. He started pushing me away and stopped coming home to visit.We had plans to one day get married and even knew the street we were going to live on. He called my daughter his own and he was the sweetest guy ever. All of a sudden he is ignoring me and acting so different. He had said he needed to get his life settled and sorted and thought we should go our own ways for now until he gets his issues resolved. I responded by telling him I wasn't interested in doing that and if he wants to go our own ways it would be permanent. I asked him if that was what he wanted and he still hasn't answered me. That was two week ago. I told him he would have to delete the status and everything on facebook because it wasn't my choice it was his. He has ignored my attempts to talk to him and even my phone calls and he has logged on to facebook everyday and has not deleted anything. He hasn't done anything and I just don't know what to do. He says he is going through so many issues and that no one will understand not even his family friends or me. He hasn't seen me in over a month and he is usually a really sweet guy. He is completely ignoring me now. I even told him that I completely understand if My daughter and I don't fit into his life anymore and I just love him and I want to see him happy even if its not with me but he needs to tell me something. He ignores that even. He even ignored my daughters request to see him on Fathers day.She called him and even dropped a card off on his door at his house here. She calls him dad. I mean he was the sweetest guy before and he would help a fly even. I just don't understand because I have given him plenty of chances to get out of the relationship yet he doesn't take it. However he doesn't give our relationship anything it needs to survive. He had told me when he took this job that we would have to just see each other on the weekends and then he said I needed to agree to move there one day if we ever got married and I did. Immediately after that it all fell apart??? I just don't understand. I love him with all my heart. I mean he has always been scared of the next steps in our relationship but I never thought so scared he would tun away like this? I have never wanted anything so bad in my life. yesterday was father's day and he posted pictures where he went to Colorado whitewater rafting. He was doing that while I am at home crying over him meanwhile my daughter is upset and trying to call him. She has never had a man in her life and I made sure that we were together for a long time and he was so good to us before they got real close. I thought we would be together forever as we talked about marriage a lot and even knew where we would buy our home. He is showing me with every action or inaction he doesn't want us in his life anymore but why can't I let go? I mean he was never this way. And to me it is so hard because he will not talk to me. I haven't done anything wrong to him and neither has my daughter. Why is he doing this in this way? I told him if he wants to break up it doesn't have to get ugly or mean. He doesn't have to pretend we never even existed. I can handle it, I just want to know. Like the rapids he said when he met us he never wanted to do them anymore because he had us to worry about then he does the rapids and posts he scariest pics possible on facebook? It is like he is reverting back to how he was before we were around. ? Please any advice. I sent him another e-mail this morning. I am heart broken and I cry all day.

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